[ advertisement ]
Heel Divas vs. Face Divas (18 Diva tag match)
Alot of talent on show here (it's not as hot as it sounds) and it starts off with Jillian and Mickie James. Mickie leaps onto her and beats Jillian around with ease Jabaal Sheard Jersey , tagging out to Tiffany. Jillian trades out to Beth who runs her over. Actually I don't know who half of these women are but Tiffany rolls up whoever this dark haired chick is for the three. That was surprisingly fast.
Winners: Faces
Santino comes out to say he went to the top of WWE to a guy who is dead to try and get in the battle royal. He says he has what it takes to be Miss Wrestlemania. He then unleashes the "Mankini" and struts around like a Chippendale dancer. Why. GOD WHY. His music is cut off as Beth decides to give him a piece of his mind and the women all maul him.
Somehow during a video segment, Jerry magically changed clothes behind the table and rises up to get ready for his match with Chris Jericho. God help us all. Commercials...
Back to the show where we replay Jericho crushing Ric's watch. We cut to Jerry who has presumably been making everyone in the ring listen to his crappy theme this whole time before aspiring Mankini Model Chris Jericho arrives.
Jerry Lawler vs. Chris Jericho
Jerry just starts punching on Jericho which is totally illegal. Jericho finally powers out of the corner and starts running Lawler down, kicking him back down every time he tries to stand. Jericho forgets that Lawler hulks up sometimes and Jerry starts punching him around the ring before just pounding his knuckles into his forehead on the ground while the ref tries to pull him back. Jericho casually locks on the walls after letting him having his courtesy hits.
Winner: Jericho
Jericho stalks over Lawler and slaps him on the head before dragging him up by his handlebar ears. Lawler suddenly levels him with one right and Jericho takes a walk. Lawler invites him back into the ring as Jericho says he already beat him. He says it won't be how he beats them at Mania, it will be how badly he beats them....
Back to the show where we get replays of Edge vs. Cena and Edge vs. Big Show. Edge approaches Cena in the back and convinces him to team up against Big Show at Mania to take him out since he knocked out both of their asses with ease before. Cena says it makes sense but he'd rather lose on his own than get help. We cut from this to Dibiase who says what Orton has to say will change the WWE universe forever. We've been stuck with Cole by himself for this whole segment. When is Lawler coming back? He didn't get his [censored] kicked that bad. We cut to the coffin in the hearse and Shawn Michaels rises out but apparently the sound guy forgot to turn his microphone on as we go to commercial.
Back to the show where for some reason the [censored] Cat Dolls are going to be at Wrestlemania, or at least one of them. She asks us if we want to see her there. They replay the segment that was silent before and he said "You were expecting someone else?". Lawler returns to the ringside but still decides to forego putting on clothes while Cole recounts every horrible thing we've seen tonight so far in case we were deluded good things had happened. Rey Mysterio as Skeletor arrives. I'll head scissors you He man! JBL arrives to us to say that tonight is psychological to let Mysterio know he won't stand a chance Brandon Gibson Jersey , because apparently you should give away PPV matches on TV for free.
Rey Mysterio vs. Intercontinental Champion JBL (Non title Match)
JBL forces Rey to the corner and slams him down on the break, hammering his back with forearms and leveling the midget with a right. Rey comes back with a kick and delivers a head scissors. He tries for the 619 but JBL catches him with a clothesline. Rey comes back hard but a springboard cross body has him leaping into a kick to the gut. JBL begins tossing Rey with a fall away slam. Rey rolls to the floor and takes a breather. JBL follows and kicks him around as the ref finally decides to bother counting for a little bit. JBL tosses Rey back in for a two count. JBL pummels Rey into a corner and puts him up top which is obviously a good idea against a cruiserweight. This ends as well as you thought with a senton. Mysterio hits an exiguities and the 619 whiffs. Rey dropkicks JBL in the [censored] and finally hit's the 619 to the splash for the three.
Winner: Rey
Back to the show for Wrestlemania 11 recap. John Cena is out next to take on The Big Show. This leads me to believe that once again our main event tonight is just going to be a speech from Orton that probably will break out into a fight....
The Big Show vs. John Cena
Big Show strikes a boxing stance and comes across the ring&[censored] ip;to kick Cena in the stomach. HAHA! Big Show tosses Cena around and starts walking on him, literally. Big Show continues to just toss Cena out of all of his moves, punching Cena back down every time he tries to get back up. Cena tries to build momentum but is once again just shrugged off like a mosquito. Cena drops Show and tries for an STF but Show just kicks him off across the ring before sending him to the floor with a big baseball slide as we go to commercial...
Back to the show where Big Show is still stepping on Cena a lot. I feel like I just saw this before we went to commercial. He stands on Cena's chest wit2Unlimited betting offers Reading a sp.
Brandon Gibson Jersey
Moderators: mgmirkin, Moderators